How To Deal With Loneliness After A Break Up

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Break ups are emotionally chaotic times and the most difficult part of it is to deal with the loneliness. After all, the fear of being alone is one of the biggest reasons for people to get into relationships. However, now that it’s over, there’s no need to think about the past. Break ups are a part of everyone’s life and just because a relationship has ended, there’s no need to give up on life altogether. Here are a few ways for you to deal with post breakup loneliness:

Similar posts that you may also like: 1. Get Your Friends to Trust You, 2. Ways to Be More Likable, 3. Make Your Ex Jealous and 4. Get Over A Break Up.

Throw out anything that reminds you of him/her

The first rule of dealing with a breakup is to remove anything that reminds you of his/her existence in your life. To deal with loneliness, you have to deal with reality. As long as your EX memories keep bogging you down, you will feel alone and maybe even abandoned.

Surround yourself with friends

Friends are a quick fix for any kind of emotional distress. It is very natural to feel a burning desire to deal with your grief and loss on your own while avoiding company altogether but unless you make the effort to get out of loneliness, nothing will change. Go out with your friends even if you have to push yourself and try to go back to your life as it was before the relationship. If you make an effort to establish normalcy in your life, half the battle is won there itself.

Talk to your family/friends about your feelings

It is very important to communicate your feelings. Keeping all the emotions and hurt bottled up inside you is only going to aggravate your situation. Vent it out. Let your friends know what you feel. Give them the chance to help you to deal with it.

Write about your feelings

Some people find it difficult to express themselves and a breakup can lead to a lot of confusion. If you are one of those people, start maintaining a journal where you can write about your feelings. Writing them down can give you the much needed clarity. In fact, if you write about your feelings, you will always be honest because people tend to hide feelings and emotions from others but never themselves. Write poems, letters or whatever you want to.

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Find a hobby

An empty mind is a devil workshop. The more you sit idle at home, the more you will think about your ex and wonder what went wrong. Excessive thinking can push you into self blame, unnecessary regrets and even depression. Try to channelize all your emotions into another activity. Start a hobby or if you had one, spend more time on it. Use your energy to hone your skills rather than getting into unnecessary psychoanalysis.

Come to peace with reality

It’s very important to embrace reality and accept the fact that your ex has moved on. Pining about him/her or hoping for a miracle to bring him/her back is not going alter your life in any way. On the contrary, it will make it more difficult for you to move on and you will feel lonelier than ever!

Go out on your own

Here’s a fun thing you can do to get rid of your loneliness. Go out of your house and walk into any restaurant/movie theatre or bar that you see. Going out on your own will boost your self esteem because you will not be scared of people judging you. At times, friends and family might fail to see your point of view because they all have their own theories of what they think is best for you. So, go ahead, introduce yourself to a couple of strangers and have a general conversation with them. Don’t exchange numbers or anything though because it’s better to maintain a distance during when you are emotionally vulnerable. Just go out and have fun!

Don’t allow the bed to attract you

After a breakup, your bed and couch will seem to be your best friends but do not get attracted to them. What you need is an active social life to deal with all the loneliness, not more seclusion.

Keep a positive outlook

Another crucial thing to keep in mind when fighting post breakup loneliness is to always have a positive take on things and a hope for a better future. If the relationship has ended, look at the bright side. You will get someone who deserves you. You have got another shot at life and love so don’t let it go to waste. Even if you feel he/she was the best person for you, you can’t be so sure because you haven’t seen the future.

Don’t think about your EX at all times

It is normal to think about your ex and things you did together but whenever such a thought comes to your head, push it out. Reliving all the memories will make you feel even more lonely.

Channel out the aggression

If you have a lot of anger and aggression about everything that happened, channel it out. Join a gym. Focus on self development. Take kickboxing classes. Such intensive activities will help you to release stress and deal with all the frustration.

Stay away from alcohol and drugs

It’s quite common to resort to alcohol or drugs to escape from reality. But honestly, you will have to face it sooner or later and if you choose to face it later, chances are that your reality will be much more harsh. Alcohol and drugs are the worst friends someone can possibly have.

  • Linda

    Whatever you do, don’t stay alone. Avoid the urge to lie on your bed in a dark room and ask someone for help…

  • Emma

    Yes, you must be with a friend, to keep you away from depression. I would really suggest – celebrate being single again! party, and don’t rush into another relationship for some time.

  • aleeza kapoor

    yes u must share ur feelings with ur frnds n family n try to busy yourself in any other activities n feel relx n never think u r alone try to be happy with ur family nd frnds :) just thinking that its a part of your life :)

  • Rosie martin

    I’m 61 and had been celibate for over 10yrs. this guy was my Soulmate. however, the cracks began to show… my problem is this, I dont have many friends and they are married, I have v little money and am on invalidity pension. this makes it hard to get out and socialise but i found the article very good

    • Simone D.

      Dear Rosie,

      You seem to be a lovely lady and I feel for you. I am sending you hugs and comfort. XXX

  • Alisha

    You have to give you time and come to peace with reality. I think this point is very important. I don’t think you have to delete all your memories with him. You don’t have to burn all your fotos, throw away all his gifts, etc… hide them to be not to obvious of course, especially when the break up is fresh, but it’s still a wonderful chapter of your life you have to be able to remember with a smile while enjoying your new one. Further I agree to the essential of not attract to much to your bedroom in the darkness… i did this for too long and it just wasted a lot of time for nothing. Put yourself out there, surround you with friends. They’re here for such moments. Then get yourself help. I talked to a professional life coach (recommend Your24hCoach) to talk about my ended relationship because I didn’t want to bother my friends too much. It helped me a lot to find my way back thinking positively. At the end keep yourself busy enough not giving you time to worry about the past.